Hello and welcome to the aligned achiever podcast. I’m your host, Siobhan Barnes, and today we’re talking about capacity over hustle and how to build that inner stability that’s required for sustainable success. Now I know that’s a little bit of a mouthful, but the reason why, behind I wanted to create today’s topic is that at the time of recording, or in q4 2025, it’s a busy time of year. And I’ve noticed, as I reflect back on the last last decade, this time of year always is busy, right? I know it’s particularly busy for my husband, and obviously he’s a key part of my life. It’s busy for my kids. They’re very active in their sporting season and typically busy for me in my work where, typically this is where clients are trying to finish the year strong and wanting to get ahead, to prepare for the new year and get themselves set up.

So I wanted to talk about capacity over hustle, because, to be full transparency, I was really inspired by a post by Danielle Canty. She’s somebody that I follow. She used to be the co founder of boss babe, and has gone out on her own, and she wrote a post about capacity. And I just thought, My goodness, that is it. Capacity is your ability to be able to hold all that you have to hold. Capacity is the ability to hold growth challenges and success without being overwhelmed. The best example I can give you of this is if is motherhood, right? If I reflect on my own life and I look back if I was to go from being a single woman falling pregnant to suddenly having to live my life right now, three kids who’ve got multiple activities, doing all the different things and trying to find their independence and still needing me around, because they’re kind of like pre teen and tween and teenagers, I would not have been able to cope, because that version of me wasn’t stretched beyond that comfort zone to get there. And if I had to jump from that to no children to three children at this age, it would have been so overwhelming, I probably wouldn’t have had the capacity to hold it, and I probably would have broken down.

So capacity is your ability to be able to hold all that you’re holding. I’ve seen this with the senior leaders that I coach. Right? It’s the ability to be able to manage the P and L and deliver something to senior leadership that’s saying, you know, or the board, we need these results. This is your target. Make sure you hit it and being able to be accountable to that goal, but to deal with the nitty gritty of what’s required of the team, motivating them to be able to achieve that. Because when you’re at that level, it’s not just you who’s the like responsible. You’re responsible for managing and motivating a group of people, which brings its challenges. So capacity really matters. And we often think that the way to quote unquote success, or the way to quote unquote achievement of our goals is to hustle more. Let me do more. Let me be more. Let me accelerate more. And that’s just one component, right? The doing part is one component. But the the real, the real work, the real area that we really need to focus on is on capacity. Can you hold it and not fall apart. Can you withstand the pressure that you might be under? And so if you’re listening to this and you’re like, oh my gosh, I am somebody who’s being stretched, and my capacity is being extended, because maybe you’ve taken on a new role this year, or maybe you’re looking after an aging parent, and that’s adding to your load outside of work, or maybe you’re starting to have kids and suddenly, woof, things are changing, right?

And all that time that you had before is is not there anymore. This is just you building your capacity. And this is really the most important thing that I think we really need to focus on when we think about achieving our goals. And here’s also why you can’t out strategize your nervous system. So capacity is related and correlated to your nervous system, how you handle stress, how you handle overwhelm. These are signals that your internal capacity may or may not match the demands of your external goals. So success is not just about strategy and what it is you’re doing, but it’s really about emotional regulation and nervous system resilience, ie, can you bounce back from failure? Are you able to pivot? Are you able to not let somebody’s feedback or comment? On who you are, take you out for for a long period of time, so your nervous system, you know, no, I don’t think many people really talk about this, like, this is what’s required to be a leader. And you could put this in the category of, like, soft skills, but it’s absolutely important. And what I’ve seen with clients that are able to handle phenomenal, challenging dynamics at work.

They’re the ones who know how to regulate their nervous system. They’re the ones who have built the capacity for change, for uncertainty, for things to go wrong, for team members to say the wrong thing and do the wrong thing, and to be able to go, you know what? Okay, that’s happening. It’s beyond my control, but I’m going to do what’s within my control, and I’m going to handle it like a pro. And as I speak to this, I can think of several clients, several people in my life, that really embody this. And for me, I find that really inspiring, because that is where people are able to create wonderful and amazing things for themselves.

So if you’re listening to this and you’re thinking, oh my gosh, I am not one of those people. I lose it. I find myself regularly not being able to cope. I remember when I was working in corporate, I was not coping. My capacity was I was being stretched beyond my comfort zone, that I burnt out and I was overwhelmed. And I remember I would go to the bathroom stall, and I would cry to, like, release all that energy, freshen up, and then go and try and lead this meeting and manage this project. That’s an example of what happens when your capacity isn’t there.

So if you’re listening to this and you’re at that breaking point, take a deep breath. It’s okay. You’re allowed to not have the capacity for the demands that life is putting on you right now. And sometimes, you know, I think we put pressure on ourselves to be able to do more, have more, achieve more, and all the things. But as I talk about in previous podcast episodes, I really believe there are seasons in life where you you are ready to take on board more, and you’re in that growth stage. You’re accelerating, and it’s like, Okay, I’m gonna do more. And there are stages and phases of life where it’s like, you know what? I’m just gonna maybe cruise cruise control for a little bit here, and just get my get my bearings, and then find the energy again to then do the next thing. So no matter where you are on this spectrum of like, feeling completely overwhelmed, like your capacity just isn’t there to get things done. To, you know, the other end of the spectrum where you’re like, I’ve got this. I’m all cylinders firing things feel good. Just know that where you are is perfect, and that’s a okay. The reason why I’m talking about this is to remind you of how important nervous system regulation, checking in with your body is and doing the things that support you.

So what do I mean by that? I mean taking the time out to go and exercise and go to the gym. In fact, as I’m a living embodiment of this. Now, as I’m recording this, it’s 415 I’ve got a full morning to early afternoon of Back to Back calls and sessions, and I’m very tempted to not go to the gym or do any exercise, because I’ve still got a bunch of follow up work to do, and I’m going to take myself off and go, go for that walk, go and recharge, because I know that when I do those things, I have more energy, and I build my capacity to hold more and oftentimes, When I’m on that walk or I’m at the gym or doing something like that, my brain can switch off and connect the dots that I cannot do when I’m at my desk.

So that’s what I mean by that. You if you’re trying to build your capacity, you’re prioritizing how to regulate your nervous system. Come back to the practices that support you, and this is where it’s foundational stuff, not rocket science, sleep, eating, well, moving your body, being with loved ones and feeling good and having that social connection. These are the some of the things that are really important. And this is where things like breath, work, yoga, meditation are also helpful, because they actually work with your nervous system to bring you into that state of ventral vagal calm, relaxed, connected and open. And when you’re in that state, you’re able to problem solve.

The challenge that we find ourselves in is when we’re busy, right? You’ve got back to back meetings. You’re running from this thing, you’re running to the next thing, it can feel very chaotic. And what’s happening in your body and in your nervous system is you’re activated, right? You’re in fight flight mode. You’re like, going, either you’re, you know, attacking a problem head on, or you’re running away, like, I don’t want to deal with this. And for some of us, we actually go into freeze, and it’s like, Oh, can’t move.

So being able to practice and have practices that get your your body back into a regulated state are really important. Important sidebar here, you do not have to be regulated 100% of the time. That’s not what I’m saying when I say like, how can we build the capacity? How can we work with our nervous system?

Really talking about nervous system. Them flexibility, so the ability to feel activated and stressed, you know, oh my gosh, maybe an important team member has just resigned, and you’ve an important client that they work on. Of course, that’s stressful. You’re going to feel activated. You’re going to go into fight mode, or, you know, problem solving mode, and you’re going to, you know, going to get activated. That’s fine, but what do you do to calm down and, like, let that go, regulate and be able to handle the next thing.

When you’re constantly in that cycle of on, that’s when you’re going to burn out, and that’s when you’re going to stay in that chaotic energy make mistakes. You’re in that state of, you know things are going to go wrong, things are bad, and you know you’re going to become one of those people to be around, which is, can be quite negative and only see what’s going to go wrong. So it’s really important to take time out, to regulate, to calm. It’s not a waste of time. It’s not frivolous. It’s not, you know, something to put off. It’s really something to prioritize.

So mindfulness meditation, setting boundaries, prioritizing rest and recovery. All of these things are really, really important, and so bringing this back to sustainable success, this is important because success is not just that next project or that next milestone.

It’s a long term game. My guess is that you’re in a career for the long haul. There’s a lot of things that you you want to achieve, a lot of things that you want to do. And so if you’re going to stay in this for the long haul, and you’re not going to burn yourself out, it’s really important to scale sustainably, build your capacity over time, right? Not go from zero children to three children. If any of you have had triplets, like hats off to you, because I’m sure that would have been really hectic, but you know, building your capacity, building your ability to hold more and just know that with when we’re working with the nervous system, we never want to be super intense, right? Gentle, slowly, Easy does it? Because we don’t want to create any trauma in your body.

So the affirmations I really want to leave with you today as you begin to think about, oh, okay, how can I build my capacity rather than just focus on the hustle and the to do’s, is this your affirmation or mantra? Is I trust my ability to handle challenges with grace? I create success from a place of calm and alignment. And finally, I’m building a legacy, not just a career.

Now, obviously that last one, if you’re in the career that you know is not right for you, that won’t last, that won’t apply, but I want you to think about I’m building a career that matters, not just working in a job, right? If you’re listening to my podcast, then I’m sure you’re somebody who wants to do meaningful work that you love and make a contribution doing it and to be successful in it as well. So there you have it.

Today we spoke about capacity over hustle. What capacity is why it matters. We spoke about how you can’t out strategize your nervous system, and how we want to bring the nervous system in to the fold into the mix when you’re thinking about how to plan your days and how to go about your your work life. And we spoke about tips for building capacity. Some of the things that are important to build that capacity so that you can move from chaos to calm. And you know why it’s important to scale sustainably, because it’s going to allow you to have the longevity and legacy that you want in your career. And finally, we spoke about those three affirmations. I trust my ability to handle challenges with grace. I create success from a place of calm and alignment. I’m building a career that matters, not just a job.

So there you have it. Thank you for tuning in. I would love to know what resonated with you the most from this episode, so come on over. Hit reply to my email, find me on LinkedIn, find me on Instagram, and let me know what your biggest insight or takeaway was from today’s episode. Thank you so much for tuning in, and please remember you are here for a reason, beyond merely hustling, grinding and merely surviving, you matter.