Finding Clarity

The Counterintuitive First Step To Deciding What To Do About Your Career in 2021

January 12, 2021

< back to blog home

How’s 2021 been for you so far?


Whilst I’m still juggling home learning arrangements and work….I’ve been so thrilled to dive into this round of Your Soul Aligned Career and it’s been super fun to facilitate. 


In January we often kick off the year setting some big goals and intentions….


…Quit my job, start that business.


…Get that promotion.


…Start a passion/creative project.


And whilst these are awesome goals….


Very often unless the goal is aligned to what’s really right for you, you’ll just create more of the same things you’re trying to escape (e.g. stress, burn-out, difficult people etc). 


Which is why I wanted to talk about where you need to start BEFORE you start goal planning and putting projects to paper. 


I’ll admit, where you need to start is a little counterintuitive BUT it works.


When I left my corporate job to start my own business, I created the same reality for myself (long hours, burn out, stress) despite changing my situation….


And it wasn’t until I looked at this one core thing that everything changed. 


What’s the one thing? 

Blog Template (4)


Let’s dive into the counterintuitive first step to deciding where to go next in your career.



Have you tried to mix things up in your career to create a change?


Maybe you’ve…..


  • Changed roles 
  • Changed companies 
  • Changed industries
  • Even started a business


And yet you find that exactly the same challenges are coming your way. 


Perhaps you keep bumping up against:


  • A challenging boss 
  • Struggles with work life balance
  • A less than ideal company culture
  • A genuine feeling of “this isn’t it either”


If this is you, you’re in the right place! 


Most people think that changing an external circumstance is going to be the solution to finding greater happiness and fulfillment in their work. 


Whilst taking action to change things is important, that’s just one piece of the puzzle….

If you’re thinking about your new career direction, I really encourage you to go a little bit deeper….beyond how you can change the external circumstances.


Instead I encourage you to look into what you believe and feel about your current challenges?


Siobhan Barnes - Hong Kong Life Coach Career Coach Blue Street 2s

Whilst taking action to change things is important, that’s just one piece of the puzzle….

Perhaps you:

  • Feel like you’re going nowhere at the organisation that you’re in and believe that it’s a dead end 
  • Feel underappreciated and unseen and believe that your boss doesn’t see the value you add to the organisation
  • Feel overwhelmed and like you’re always chasing your tail to keep up. You believe that there’s always more to do and that you’ll never be “on top of things”

What is it for you? What do you believe and feel about your current challenges?

I know these words “belief” and “feel” can sound a little bit fluffy and a little bit ungrounded and unscientific but they are absolutely foundational to you discerning what choice point to make. 

What you believe is really important when it comes to the outcome of the desired change you’re looking for. 

I’ll give you an example of this in my own personal life….

When I left my corporate job to start my business I wanted to do work that really mattered. I wanted to have freedom and flexibility.


I knew I wanted to start a family soon so that was really on the cards and I wanted to set myself up for that.

What happened when I eventually did officially launch my business is that I recreated the same reality for myself that I had in my corporate job. 

I was working late long hours. 


I was really stressed and burnt out. 


My diary was chock full. 


I was running around like a headless chicken. 


I wasn’t prioritizing exercise. 


I was really stressing out.


I was operating using the same operating system and way of being that I had been used to when I was working in the corporate world. 


Why was it that even though the external circumstances had changed (I got to work from my office and hang with my kids) I was still operating in the same way?


The reason why that was, was because I had a belief deeper that was running the show. 

Siobhan Barnes - Hong Kong Life Coach Career Coach Blue Street 2sa

What I mean by “deeper” is my subconscious. 


It was in my DNA and operating system. 


If you look at it as if you’ve got your phone…

I was running this new reality (entrepreneur) in this new desired life on an old operating system right back on an Apple iPhone 3.


My fundamental belief was…


“I’m not smart enough. I’m not intelligent enough. I have to work so much harder than anybody else.”


This ran deeeeeeeeep for me. 


So I had to really look at the belief system around working and worthiness.


You know….


It wasn’t the fact that starting a business was the solution. 


It wasn’t the fact that you know running a consultancy was the solution. 


Really the solution was to look at that belief “that I have to work hard in order to be enough to be successful.” 


That was the real work I had to do to make a shift. 


When I relaxed into that I became okay with….


…..having less hours to work (because I was making a conscious choice to be there with my kids). 


….not necessarily being a high growth company from the get go. Knowing that I was going to fall pregnant again and have more kids and being ok with my own pace. 


So dear one,  if you’re reading this and you’re looking at making a choice point in your career and you’re looking at all the different options ahead of you and you’re wondering “What is that magic solution or scenario that’s going to make me happy?”


I invite you to….


Take a deep breath and ask yourself:


What is it that you believe about work?


What is it you believe about what it means to have a career?


This belief system/this operating system is what’s going to run the show and if you don’t make sure it’s aligned to a truer more aligned belief, then you’ll just create more of the same. 


No matter what you change externally, you’ll just create the same reality for yourself but in a different environment. 


  • Do you believe you have to achieve incredible success to be “enough”?
  • Do you believe that you have to work hard?
  • Do you believe that you can only make money in professional professions [like being a lawyer, banker, professional services exec] in order to make money?


I would encourage you to look at your beliefs first and start to challenge some of those beliefs so that you can open up a whole window of possibilities and different opportunities that you may not even realize are there. 

Siobhan Barnes - Hong Kong Integrative Life Coach Career Coach - Collaboration Image4 (1)

From this place then decide what feels right for you. 


So leave a comment for me below or send me a message privately and let me know…


What is the fundamental thought/belief that’s running the show?


I would absolutely love to know. 


Last week I did a free intention setting workshop in the Soul Aligned Professional Women Facebook Group. In this workshop we dropped below the level of the mind and tapped into a core alignment piece to set you up for 2021. 


If you want to catch the replay and stay connected between these weekly posts, I’d love for you to come and join. Simply CLICK HERE to join the group or search for Soul Aligned Professional Women in your Facebook App.


Oh and my signature intimate group program, Your Soul Aligned Career, officially kicked off this week and if you’re desiring to join us, let’s schedule a time to speak and see if it’s the right fit. 


With love,



Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *




© the neon life society t/a siobhan barnes

privacy policy